Just stumbled upon your writing via Circle. What a find!
I had to stop at #1: Clarity can be weaponized. That completely flipped my perspective. I’ve always beaten myself up for not having ‘enough’ clarity, but you’ve made me realize that chasing clarity can sometimes be more dangerous than staying in the fog. It’s seductive, yes, but like a siren’s song, it can lead us to the wrong shore if we’re not careful. Ambiguity, as frustrating as it is, often leaves room for growth.
And your point about desperation was an interesting reframe. It’s another way of saying that hunger is the fire that lets us burn through fear. Without it, we wouldn’t even approach certain walls, let alone break through it.
Your writing is like a gentle intellectual ambush. I wasn’t expecting to be hit with these ideas, but now they’re staying with me. Looking forward to reading more.
Man, this was so good that I had one thought, and then another, and now just lots of thoughts whirling around.
I loved that you brought up Marisa Keegan: her book was probably the first book of essays I truly enjoyed and I always wonder what she would say/write today. I randomly feel the grief of having lost this amazing writer so suddenly. I recently read her essay on whales and it was just so good.
Anyways, back to you: I wish each of these had been a post. So much wisdom my friend. Lucky to know you.
Thanks for sharing. I can relate to several of these points. Like relationships to home spaces and the grueling job search. Writing is social and I think Substack eases this function of writing well, even if it does also serve as social media now.
Great reflection and I think it is increasingly important to romanticize aspects of life!
Regarding breathing - I also did not know how to breathe. Fully exhaling has made me feel much better this year. I highly recommend the app Open, it’s been remarkable for me, easily the most beneficial health & wellness product I’ve tried
My goal this year is to retrain my mind to think positively. It’s draining thinking negatively, which brings up anger reliving the past. Negativity has ruled and fueled my life. I am going to stop social media as I need to find myself again and not live someone else’s pedestrian life. I will try to connect with people in hopes of building a community and thus a home.
I’m in my 30s so not sure how ahead of the curve I am! 😂 but it’s definitely been a big transformative shift in thinking for me this last year! And yes you should definitely post, it’s so great to see how people react and are impacted by your words and it’s helped sharpen my thinking quite a bit when people add comments - and even points I disagree with but can appreciate the nuance.
1. Clarity can be weaponized - By the end of 2024, I was almost baptized by the the philosophy of the book "The One Thing" by Gary Keller and Jay Papasan. It is a great book and you should read it.
In the 1st week of 2025, a learned friend suggested I read the essay Fox and the Hedgehog (by Isiah Berlin) and I had to reconsider my faith.
And then I chanced upon Ken Burns' Leonardo Da Vinci and now I am close to being an atheist.
4. Make negative space on your calendar - the lobster analogy was spot on. I just want to learn to do this. Would love to know how you get to do this.
6. Information consumption and creation is the mental equivalent of Diet and Exercise. - This is such a powerful analogy. You should copyright this. You just need to add a caveat, while it is believed that diet is more important than exercise, in the mental realm creation is more important than consumption.
8. I don't know how to breathe. +1. My Whoop app says the best thing that impacts my recovery is my mouth tape (way above than my journaling, meditation and 40 mins of cardio). Mouth tape forces me to breathe via nose at night, and somehow it also helps me do so in the day. And i consciously watch my breath more often. Don't breathe with your mouth was the one liner that still stays with me from James Nestor's book "Breathe" I read years back, but still struggle to follow.
11. Writing is Social. This was life-changing. Period.
It looks like you’re really starting to discover something I didn’t really appreciate until well into my 30s. There’s a kind of knowledge that goes beyond thought, that through practice and intentional repetition merges with soft tissue. By this means, knowledge transforms from thought to mental action, which is to say, wisdom.
Sorry if that sounds self-important, but I tend to layer poetry onto everything I write the way I spread butter on bread—too thick, and then a little more to make sure I can really taste it. 🥸
I want this year to be the year I start pushing myself to write more and maybe even publish it (via Substack, if nothing else).
I hear the words 'Negative Space' and cringe! Rather than being the absence of something meaningful, the 'space' has a defined shape, color (and often texture) it serves as a pivotal event in seeing art; it divides and defines an area in the work. Its true meaning is to lessen the gaze on a catalytic element and redirect attention to another part of a subject.
Just stumbled upon your writing via Circle. What a find!
I had to stop at #1: Clarity can be weaponized. That completely flipped my perspective. I’ve always beaten myself up for not having ‘enough’ clarity, but you’ve made me realize that chasing clarity can sometimes be more dangerous than staying in the fog. It’s seductive, yes, but like a siren’s song, it can lead us to the wrong shore if we’re not careful. Ambiguity, as frustrating as it is, often leaves room for growth.
And your point about desperation was an interesting reframe. It’s another way of saying that hunger is the fire that lets us burn through fear. Without it, we wouldn’t even approach certain walls, let alone break through it.
Your writing is like a gentle intellectual ambush. I wasn’t expecting to be hit with these ideas, but now they’re staying with me. Looking forward to reading more.
Thank you so much! This made my day to read I’m glad that the reframes could find their way to the right person to be helpful!
I can't even convince myself to go to an F1 race, and I'm in Austin (40 minutes from the track). Traffic, expensive, loud.
We have great coffee shops though that I'd rather spend my weekend at, quietly reading like now.
Man, this was so good that I had one thought, and then another, and now just lots of thoughts whirling around.
I loved that you brought up Marisa Keegan: her book was probably the first book of essays I truly enjoyed and I always wonder what she would say/write today. I randomly feel the grief of having lost this amazing writer so suddenly. I recently read her essay on whales and it was just so good.
Anyways, back to you: I wish each of these had been a post. So much wisdom my friend. Lucky to know you.
Thank you! Definitely will expand on more of these as posts! I realized that about halfway through 😂🙏
I loved these points and many made me think. Thank you so much for sharing in a way that is personal, each with a story, and with beautiful prose.
The best reflection I read thus far!
Wow! Thank you so much! ☺️
I love these reflections!! ❤️
Thank you Steph!!!
Thanks for sharing. I can relate to several of these points. Like relationships to home spaces and the grueling job search. Writing is social and I think Substack eases this function of writing well, even if it does also serve as social media now.
Thank you I’m glad some of it resonated for you!
Great reflection and I think it is increasingly important to romanticize aspects of life!
Regarding breathing - I also did not know how to breathe. Fully exhaling has made me feel much better this year. I highly recommend the app Open, it’s been remarkable for me, easily the most beneficial health & wellness product I’ve tried
Thank you! I will try Open - breathing is super hard for me 😂
Little 5 minute breath thing has a huge impact on me, I wish I had known about it my whole life
This is a lovely reflection. So many insightful and unique thoughts. Thanks for sharing.
Thank you!!
My goal this year is to retrain my mind to think positively. It’s draining thinking negatively, which brings up anger reliving the past. Negativity has ruled and fueled my life. I am going to stop social media as I need to find myself again and not live someone else’s pedestrian life. I will try to connect with people in hopes of building a community and thus a home.
That’s a great goal ❤️
I’m in my 30s so not sure how ahead of the curve I am! 😂 but it’s definitely been a big transformative shift in thinking for me this last year! And yes you should definitely post, it’s so great to see how people react and are impacted by your words and it’s helped sharpen my thinking quite a bit when people add comments - and even points I disagree with but can appreciate the nuance.
Not sure how I found this. I am not a huge fan of list writing but #9 was enlightening. Well done.
I love and resonate with multiple things here.
1. Clarity can be weaponized - By the end of 2024, I was almost baptized by the the philosophy of the book "The One Thing" by Gary Keller and Jay Papasan. It is a great book and you should read it.
In the 1st week of 2025, a learned friend suggested I read the essay Fox and the Hedgehog (by Isiah Berlin) and I had to reconsider my faith.
And then I chanced upon Ken Burns' Leonardo Da Vinci and now I am close to being an atheist.
4. Make negative space on your calendar - the lobster analogy was spot on. I just want to learn to do this. Would love to know how you get to do this.
6. Information consumption and creation is the mental equivalent of Diet and Exercise. - This is such a powerful analogy. You should copyright this. You just need to add a caveat, while it is believed that diet is more important than exercise, in the mental realm creation is more important than consumption.
8. I don't know how to breathe. +1. My Whoop app says the best thing that impacts my recovery is my mouth tape (way above than my journaling, meditation and 40 mins of cardio). Mouth tape forces me to breathe via nose at night, and somehow it also helps me do so in the day. And i consciously watch my breath more often. Don't breathe with your mouth was the one liner that still stays with me from James Nestor's book "Breathe" I read years back, but still struggle to follow.
11. Writing is Social. This was life-changing. Period.
Thank you for the thoughtful reply! I’ll need to check those books and essays out.
I actually got mouth tape but haven’t tried it yet - that’s amazing it’s changed your breathing pattern even outside of sleep!
It looks like you’re really starting to discover something I didn’t really appreciate until well into my 30s. There’s a kind of knowledge that goes beyond thought, that through practice and intentional repetition merges with soft tissue. By this means, knowledge transforms from thought to mental action, which is to say, wisdom.
Sorry if that sounds self-important, but I tend to layer poetry onto everything I write the way I spread butter on bread—too thick, and then a little more to make sure I can really taste it. 🥸
I want this year to be the year I start pushing myself to write more and maybe even publish it (via Substack, if nothing else).
I hear the words 'Negative Space' and cringe! Rather than being the absence of something meaningful, the 'space' has a defined shape, color (and often texture) it serves as a pivotal event in seeing art; it divides and defines an area in the work. Its true meaning is to lessen the gaze on a catalytic element and redirect attention to another part of a subject.
Thank you!!